Aloha Dogwalker

A peek into Clarkson's head yesterday when the dogwalker came in to let him out:

"Awesome. Dogwalker is here...I'm gonna bite her and then make her clean up my poop. This is the best."

"Weird that dogwalker is undressing."

"It's not bikini weather."

"Dogwalker has a pretty banging body I guess"

"Alright dogwalker, I gotta poop, let's go."

Let me explain...

So as you know, we hired a dogwalking service to take Clarkson on daily walks when we are away at work. When we first hired the service, we didn't actually meet the person who would be walking him, but Joe stayed home from work one day to meet who I shall now refer to as "Maria"

Maria is Hawaiian. The day that Joe met her, she decided to walk Clarkson in a tanktop despite the fact that it was not exactly warm outside. Apparently in her mind, acclimating to the Chicago winter would best happen if she were to walk around without appropriate clothing. She, unlike the dog, was unlikely to grow a winter coat, but we thought that it was really up to her how she wanted to do her job, just as long as she take the dog for walks and clean up his poops .

Earlier today we got an email from Maria and all it said was "Hi, I am [Maria's real name] and I was wondering if you found a key in your apartment yesterday." Unfortunately, neither Joe nor I had found a key, but with Maria's email came a very important bit of information - her last name.

Two clicks on facebook later and we had this staring us in the face:





OH. MY. GOD.


So, in my head, here's what went down: Maria popped in to Two Tommies one afternoon, she let Clarkson out of his little play area, she stripped down to her best bikini, and she nonchalantly walked him around lakeview in 20 degree weather.

Not four hours after we found this little gem on facebook, we received the following email from our dogwalking service:

"Sean,
I am sorry to inform you that [Maria's real name] was let go earlier today. I will be walking Clarkson until we can find a suitable replacement."

I immediately confirmed that Maria no longer had our key and that there was no foul play present (beyond losing someone else's key and being caught walking dogs in her bathing suit). All is good. Looks like no more peep show for the muppet baby.

He's getting neutered in February anyway.